love love love everywhere

Hello!

I’m very glad you are creating something for me, whether it is fic or art! Frankly, outside of myself, I’m even just happy you are creating something for any of the pairings I prompted! I love these pairings a lot and I truly believe that there just needs to be more stuff out there for them.

Now, a few things you should probably know about my tastes in narrative and art:

- My most formative narratives are the Indiana Jones movies and Terminator 2, and I’ve affinity for that particular kind of mood in the art and fiction I seek out (although not necessarily all of the content present in those films (for instance, I’m not fond of the racism)). Make of that what you will.
- On that note, I love more light-hearted themes and settings but at the same time I eat up The Dramaz like candy. So, generally, I prefer a nice mix.
- I don’t do rape and/or serial killers at all.
- I’m absolutely, more-than-fine with kids and pregnancy. I love families and family-ish situations!

That’s it! I hope you have fun doing your thing. If you at least manage to do that, I know I’ll be happy with it too.

Dear 2013 rarewomen author,

Hello!! Thank you for signing up for this exchange! That alone gives you pretty much a free pass as far as I’m concerned. Especially since, apparently, you are willing to write something for at least one of the many women I have found myself enamored with. This letter is mostly here to help guide you if you have absolutely no idea what you’re going to write. However, I do have a few VERY STRONG PREFERENCES when it comes to fics and I would really love it if you would adhere to them, please. These are the items I have bolded, for your convenience, so if you want you could just skim this letter for those things and completely disregard the rest. Of course, you can always disregard those as well, if they work against what you really, really wish to write. (But I really rather prefer you didn’t, obviously.)

( More. )

Hello!!!

Wow, it certainly has been awhile. But, alas, Tumblr usually proves to be too stressful for me so if I want to say anything I might as well say it here.

Except, I long ago talked myself into believing I never have anything worthwhile to say - see: the combined issues of me having a low self-esteem and “Tumblr usually proving to be too stressful for me” - so it is now even more ridiculously hard for me to come up with things I’m comfortable talking about than has been for a long time now. And I’m incredibly sorry that everything I do end up saying just sounds like one big pity-party. Noting that I feel miserable is the only thing I really feel competent enough to talk about, I guess.

But there are some other things I would like to put in this post! Just to have them said.

I went to San Francisco and I was definitely not miserable there! I was so not-miserable there, I had somehow convinced myself to sign up for Ladystuck, an annual fanwork exchange focusing on the ladies of Homestuck.

I did this mostly because there were certain pairings and characters I wanted to see fanwork for that I almost never see in the fandom. I really, really hope my prompts weren’t too vague because I was maybe a little sparse on the details in case they were assigned to an artist instead of a writer. Thinking back on it, I feel they were definitely too vague but I still hope whoever it may be can work with them or somehow still be inspired by them! I was certainly inspired by the prompts I was assigned, haha.

I resurrected my Twitter account kinda accidentally but also kinda on purpose - really, I just did it to see if I could because Twitter had this thing where it wouldn't let you use an e-mail address to make a new account if it was already attached to a deactivated account. I'm not planning on using it much - I don't even remember the password for it most of the time - but there it is.

Also: In addition to my main tumblr I made another super-secret tumblr that I was thinking about using to quarantine all the Homestuck stuff I happen to reblog. Although I might rename it to "roses-left-fibula" or something. Y'know, keeping traditions alive and whatnot.

I've watched the first twelve minutes of the fourth episode of Protect the Boss and I am having trouble moving any further because ( spoilers )

Gosh, I ship Dave/Karkat a lot. But in order to write fic I need to 1) learn how to write in general and 2) learn how to write Karkat specifically. Karkat, what are you even? I don’t get you.

You see, while Dave may sometimes venture into the territory of the overly verbose, I don’t think it would be that hard to keep him in character while keeping his lines strictly limited to “hahahaha” and “dude”. With Karkat, however, you’d - or rather, I would have to look within myself and find that part of myself that would come up with the most complicated way of explaining even the simplest concepts in the angriest manner possible. I know that part of me is there - somewhere. But, man, actually typing all its thoughts out. Too much work. (Of course, Karkat is a lot calmer than most of the fandom make him out to be but that's a different story.)

In any event: My life remains a tragedy.

P.S. My God. Holy crap, I’m so glad I actually typed this out! That is a totally sincere statement by the way. For the last past few weeks, words and thinking and feeling were so unbelievably hard for me. My psychiatrist put me on a mood stabilizer that I think almost killed my brain completely. It feels so good to have my thoughts back now.

It’s really okay if anybody feels the need to either defriend me or tell me personally that I’m bothering them. If people don’t… well, I never really know where I stand when it comes to other people so I just always kind of assume people hate me and are annoyed with me and are purposely trying avoid having to deal with me. Even though I know it’s stupid and people probably don’t care at all about me one way or another. I try really, really hard to avoid thinking about it and I try to carry on anyways but I would really appreciate it if people would make it clear when I’m not welcomed. This isn’t just for your benefit, but mine as well. Just, please, let be me be able to pack my things up and move on if that’s what I need to do.

This is going to be crossposted on Livejournal and Dreamwidth and I'm going to be making a post about this on Tumblr as well. I'm probably just embarrassing myself again but I really want people to know that I would appreciate it if people were clear with me. I’m trying to socialize more and overcome my handicaps but I’ve been having a hard time with it so I hope this helps.

I'm thinking about what I can read and I keep looking at romance novels but I shouldn't go there because that genre is only rife with betrayals. Oh, romance novels. Why must you continue to hurt me so, when I only want to love you?

I'm always open to reading queer coming-of-age ya novels. Right now, I'm reading The Vast Fields of Ordinary by Nick Burd, a book about a kid who routinely tells inanimate objects that he's gay. That's not the official synopsis. That's actually pretty far from important as far as the story goes. Truthfully, that only happens a couple times in the book. But it keeps popping up in my head at random moments, this mental image of this dude telling his ceiling fan he's gay, and I'd wonder where'd it come from. It's from this book. Yes, this book is the book with the kid telling his ceiling fan he's gay.

It's been taking me months to get through it though, mostly because I'm uber-suspicious of the main love interest. I just don't trust him. Probably because I don't find him all that appealing myself, therefore I feel uncomfortable that the main character does. He gets the main character to shave his head. Now, I like hair way too much to ever approve of something like that.

Wow, what a disjointed, horrible post.